The Masochism Tango

Several years ago I was introduced to the musical genius that is Tom Lehrer, and I've been a fan ever since. The insanely clever wordplay contained in his lyrics is on a level unmatched by anyone. His ability to layer these words over ridiculously catchy tunes is also first rate. His songs demand a certain level of intelligence. For me, the modern equivalent would be Tim Minchin. As terrific as Lehrer's songs are, they were better when he performed them in front of a live audience...which was fairly rare. While this isn't my favorite live version of this song (there's a better one on his "An Evening Wasted With Tom Lehrer" album), it's still pretty damn entertaining in its own right.

Buddy Hackett

We got our first VCR in our home back in December of 1988. That changed my entire world. Suddenly, all sorts of options for watching shows that I'd never been able to see before were opened up to me. Specifically, I was now able to watch The Tonight Show With Johnny Carson and Late Night With David Letterman on a daily basis. Previously, I'd seen the occasional episode here and there, but between always having school, or work, or both, I'd never really been able to regularly be up late enough to watch. I've always been one of those morning people that most of the world seems to hate.

Being able to now watch these shows on a nightly basis exposed me either to many new-to-me comedians, or gave me opportunities to see comics I was already fond of, but didn't get to see very often. One of these was Buddy Hackett, who I unfortunately never got to see live in person. Thankfully, seeing him appear on Carson's show many times somewhat made up for that. And since the advent of YouTube, so many things I've wanted to see (or to see again), are right at my fingertips.

Here's a quick clip from near the end of Carson's run (this may actually have been from Hackett's last appearance on Johnny's Tonight Show):

The Face Of Despair

Today I saw, firsthand, the face of despair. I stared into its eyes, looking long and hard into the very depths of oblivion. I could read the expression of "please kill me" on its face as easy as you can read this sentence. Never have I seen such a low. It was a palpable presence in the room. It enveloped me as I entered, and stayed with me even after I left. The fog of hopelessness within the area nearly blocked out the light from the midday desert sun.

Entering the fast-food restaurant, one was overwhelmed by the young children in line screaming and running amok, playing with the retractable belt barriers, and using the elderly folks with walkers as obstacles to skirt around. The face of despair was worn by the man behind the counter. As I entered to deliver their mail, our eyes met...and I could feel his soul being sucked out of his very being. I looked into the abyss...

...and then went back outside to my truck to continue my route, laughing manically.

Dust Mop

There's a constant source of entertainment in our house, in addition to the banter that goes on between my wife and myself. Since April of this year, we've had a feline residing here, and things are never dull with her around. She's got certain toys that she'll chase after on a regular basis, she's a committed bird-watcher, she's very vocal, and even as I attempt to write this, she is making her presence known. Apparently she thinks she's a transparent kitty, but despite her opinion, I can't actually see my keyboard thru her thick fur and increasingly large body.

As per usual with a cat, she enjoys climbing and being in high places. The library of our home affords her lots of chances to both achieve this, and to catch up on her reading. Never know what book she'll be focusing on when I stumble across her in interesting locations. Never have the tops of the bookcases been as well-dusted since she's discovered how to get up there. Nice to have a built-in cleaning service...our little mobile Swiffer Duster.

Love/Hate Relationship

I can't stand grocery shopping. Has to be towards the very top of my "Least Favorite Things To Do" list. (Oh yes. There is an actual list. What's on it varies, and it usually depends on what I'm doing at the moment. But trust me, such a list exists.) Yes, in this modern world we live in, since the hunter/gatherer type has basically disappeared, it is obviously necessary. Rather vital, even. But that doesn't mean I have to enjoy it.

So it must be some kind of testament to how much I love my wife that I actually don't mind, nay, even nearly ENJOY going grocery shopping, when I go with her. This may be helped by the fact that she is insanely creative with what she can do in the kitchen, and will walk around telling me about all the amazing creations she can conjure up in her never-ending quest to fatten me. More than once has there been an out-of-control shopping cart due to the wheels slipping on the puddle of drool that has formed under it after falling from my mouth.

I write this as I face the daunting task of having to go to the grocery store...ALONE...

Keep me in your thoughts.



Blog Post Soundtrack: Foo Fighters (live)

Smokey And The Wife

Yesterday the wife and I watched "Smokey And The Bandit", the fluff chase movie starring Burt Reynolds, Sally Field, Jerry Reed, and Jackie Gleason. Released in 1977, it was the second highest grossing movie of the year, trailing only a small little picture called Star Wars. I hadn't seen this in years, and it's still entertaining, in a "just shut your brain off and enjoy the car chases and crashes" kinda way.

In clearing out the DVR a bit, we followed this with "Nine Innings From Ground Zero", about as omega away from Smokey's alpha as you could get. This documentary focused on the role that baseball played in the recovery by New York, and the rest of the United States, from the events of 9/11. This one lead to some fairly in-depth conversations, as we wound up pausing several times to discuss current affairs (like the state of the Middle East), and parenting.

We don't often get days where we can just sit around watching movies and having quiet conversations, so I always appreciate it when one of those rolls around. I'm looking forward to spending as much time as possible with my wife over the rest of our lives. We've always got things we can watch together, and we definitely have events to talk about.

Death And Resurrection In Las Vegas

As I sit here quietly reading 'Michael Palin's Diaries 1969-1979 The Python Years' on a late sunny Sunday morning, cat at my side, wife asleep in the other room, a thought occurs to me. I'd like to start this up again. I miss writing, and my wife and I lead such a busy and event-filled life together that it would be a bit of a shame to let much of it go by undocumented. For example, just yesterday we went, mostly on a whim, to a liquidation sale at The Clarion Hotel here in Las Vegas. A place formerly owned by Debbie Reynolds, its small size and odd location (just off The Strip, and not in an exciting-by-Las-Vegas-standards way) meant it couldn't keep up with the mega-casinos that are everything now. This sale had been going on for at least a week, and EVERYTHING was up for sale...right down to the kitchen sink ($425, if I recall correctly...a slop-sink that could be placed anywhere was only $75).

As a consequence, the interior of the hotel looked as if the zombie apocalypse had occurred roughly a couple years ago. Rooms were ravaged to varying degrees, with some still maintaining some furniture, but all of it displaced. Other rooms had suffered from more pillaging, as chairs, tables, sheets, even entire beds were gone. Kat figured that they could leave the place as is and market it as The Zombie Apocalypse Hotel, and it would be booked solid. Dumber ideas have made millions of dollars.

For the record, we walked out of there with 6 dishes, 6 small bowls, a dozen green cloth napkins, a 5 foot mirror that is maybe a foot wide, a small plastic carafe, 4 hand towels, and some silverware. Only cost us 50 bucks. But the pictures of me "passed out" in random semi-destroyed hotel room bathrooms and strewn across misplaced pieces of furniture probably are worth that themselves.

Blog Post Soundtrack: Probot, Neil Young & Crazy Horse, The Clash, The Misfits (doing 'Horror Hotel'...rather appropriate), Grandmaster Flash, John Lennon